We're in full on packing mode around here. We have five weeks until we need to be out of our house. I've moved before, but this time feels different. We are leaving our first home, the one that Riley built with his own two hands, the one that we've lived in together for the past five years. Typically when you move out of a place, you can at least picture where you're going next. But I can't. We're just moving to... the water. On a sailboat.
I have this strange urge to run around the house taking pictures of all of the rooms just as they are, before I pack the pieces away into boxes. As if an image could preserve all of the memories, safe and undisturbed forever. Maybe I'm just trying to put off the inevitable. I mean, what would one even do with those sorts of pictures anyway?
I have a strange relationship with this house. To be perfectly honest, I was never completely on board with living here to begin with. Riley had started building it before I was even in the picture. His plan was to build a house that could be used as two rental apartments for the future. A smart plan to be sure, but as a newlywed excited about starting a life together, I was a little bitter about not having any say in where we were going to live, or the fact that our house was essentially a tiny apartment out in the middle of nowhere above an unfinished basement/garage. Before you judge me too harshly, just know that I am completely aware of how blessed we are to have had a house in the first place, and that these feelings were completely trivial. But still, I have always anticipated the day when we would be able to make these kinds of decisions together.
But now, I find myself strangely sentimental about it. Even though we will still own it, we're not planning to move back in (obviously we can't say for sure at this point), and it will become home to someone else. It was our first and it holds so many memories. We poured ourselves into making it a house, and then a home. And as I start to pack the tangible pieces of our memories away into boxes, I know that I will be leaving behind a little part of my heart in their place.